We've all heard about A.G.W. (man made global warming), but did you know about L.M.G.W. (livestock made global warming)? I am told the farts and belching of livestock is a large contributor to greenhouse gasses (no pun intended). The government in it's infinite wisdom tried to tax the emissions of these bovine gas bags*. Unfortunately no one was brave enough to install the monitoring devices. Well how about senior citizens? Older people seem to pass more gas because their digestive systems slow down as they age. How about charging them a tax for their contribution to global warming? What would the tax be called? How about the Federal Asset Recovery Tax, known as F.A.R.T. The E.P.A. would set limits and charges similar to taxing carbon emissions. The question is how would it be measured? Several proposals have surfaced. A specialized gas gauge was developed, except you would be charged for emptying your tank not filling it. What about a meter like they have in cabs? You would pay 2.50 for the first fart, and .25 each additional fart (no charge for waiting time between farts). How about a system like EZ pass called EZ gas. An electronic device would register every fart and electronically deduct the money from your account. Yes I am being facetious, but with a 14 trillion dollar deficit and growing this congress will be forced to tax us to death or until they have sucked all the air out of us. Already they are considering the V.A.T. (Value Added Tax). Who knows the F.A.R.T. may not be far behind (pun intended).
*http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28070487/ns/us_news-environment/t/tax-cows-hogs-passing-gas-burping/
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